Comments on the Rockets from Deadspin

Yes, I know, Deadspin isn't nearly as good as it was before Will Leitch left... it's disappointing on many levels most days now.

That said, they did post a season preview of the Houston Rockets today.

Using Brent Barry as the representative picture (!?!?!?). Odd.

Season previews have begun!

Matt over at Hardwood Paroxysm also now writes a few entries for the NBA Fanhouse. Matt must really, really like blogging because he seems to be everywhere these days! Nevertheless, he posed an interesting question to us and asked us to answer it in a few paragraphs.

"How is the Shane Battier/Ron Artest/Luis Scola thing going to work out and will it be enough to get the Rockets to the second round? Conference Finals? What's the ceiling for this team?"

What he got in return, well... you'll just have to see for yourself!

Season preview: The NBA's Southwest Division

(and yes, I had about 20 more quotes I was prepared to use. I did my best to show restraint!)

Crazy Pills = Maverick??

Let the training camp Battle Royale begin!

With training camp about to begin, there is one primary question associated with the Rockets. No, that question is not "will they ever get out of the first round?" because we know the answer to that is "hell yes, and this year in fact!" Instead, the real question is "who starts at small forward for Houston this year: Shane Battier or Ron Artest?"

Let's face it, the Rockets would not have acquired Ron Artest if we didn't consider there to be at least some sort of a weakness at the small forward position. Shane Battier is great at what he does - which is defend the opposing teams best non-center while staying out of T-Mac and Yao's way on offense. The problem is that this supposed strength is great for the Rockets when they are on the defensive end, but it slows down the offense. SI.com's Marty Burns discussed this exact dilemma today:

The skinny: Don't assume Artest will just step into the starting lineup. Battier is a valuable cog as a long-armed defender and three-point shooter. He also does a lot of other little things that complement Tracy McGrady and Yao Ming. Houston coach Rick Adelman might be reluctant to tinker with success, and instead opt to use Artest off the bench as a sparkplug and scorer much the way the Spurs do with Manu Ginobili. (At the end of games, Adelman can always use Artest and Battier on the floor with T-Mac as the principal ball handler). Artest, by the way, has said he would accept a reserve role.

Here's my concern with Burns' conclusion - yes, the Rockets have seen "success" using Battier as the small forward. But only in the regular season. Come April and May, the offense historically suffers dramatically. This is precisely why the Artest trade was made. Further, even the Spurs typically end up using Ginobili as a starter in the playoffs. Why? You play your best five guys as much as you can for as long as you can. That's what wins in the NBA. Lastly, while Artest says he would accept a reserve role, by December it would probably irritate him to see Shane continue to be a relative non-factor on offense. The last thing the Rockets want is an irritated Crazy Pills. Let's try to avoid this.

Meanwhile, because it is Ron Artest we are talking about... why not have a WWE-style Battle Royale to determine the training camp winner? Shane Battier is basically the whitest non-white dude there is, so I'm almost certain he watches professional wrestling. This could be awesome. Artest diving off the top rope to finish off Battier... only for Battier to be playing possum and roll away from the flying elbow...

Okay, yeah, it's clear I need the NBA to start. As soon as possible.

Let the countdown begin: 50 days 'til tip off!

50 days from now, the future 2008/2009 NBA Champion Houston Rockets begin the regular season by hosting the Memphis Grizzlies. Just 50 days!!

And for those looking just a little farther ahead... it's only three months and 18 days until the Rockets and new acquisition Ron Artest get to embarrass the Utah Jazz. I can't wait! And from the look of it, someone else is ready for the season to start, too!


Go Rockets!!

Does ESPN like the Houston Rockets??

My lunchtime Interwebs browsing brought me over to ESPN...
where I saw these predictions/projections for 2008/09.

Funny this is -- I can't really come up with much of a legitimate argument to say why ESPN is misguided or flat out wrong in this analysis. They predict the Rockets to get homecourt advantage and be competitive in the typically ultra-competitive Western Conference. Hard to complain about that kind of praise. I mean, they did short-change us by 6 wins (predicting only 53) - even though I did a painstaking game-by-game analysis already and determined that the magic number was indeed 59. Yes, 59 - and that was me at my most objective and non-biased moment!

So - even ESPN likes the Ron Artest trade! Excellent!

I am soooo ready for the season to start!

Because pictures are fun!

Ron Artest... in Rocket Red

I'm actually somewhat saddened that Artest didn't go the Chad Johnson route and try to legally change his name to Crazy Pills. Then I could buy a #96 jersey with "C. Pills" on the back!

(h/t - Skeets at Ball Don't Lie )

Rockets/Jazz - if only the playoffs started TODAY

With all the distractions of the Olympics and Rafer's drunken antics, I almost forgot that the Ron Artest trade should be official tomorrow. Which makes me "officially" wonder what the Rockets could have done last year if only we had the services of Crazy Pills during the playoffs.

My conclusion? There is no freakin' way the Jazz would have beat the Rockets in any of the two previous years if we had Artest on the roster. No freakin' way.

Yes, I know, the Rockets have lost to the Utah Jazz the last two years in the first round of the playoffs. Blah, blah, blah. It's not like Utah did anything thereafter. The Jazz are still o-for-forever on NBA Championship rings...

(haha, suck it, Utah!)


Ah, that taunt never gets old... but anyway...

Take a look at the rosters and matchups as they would exist today. Too many people think Utah might be one of the top 2 teams in the West right now. Those people would be wrong.

As of tomorrow, the Rockets roster/rotation will look like this:

PG: Rafer (sober, I hope)
SG: Tracy McGrady
SF: Ron Artest
PF: Luis Scola
C: Yao Ming

off the bench, we'll have the luxury of subbing in:

Shane Battier, Brent Barry, Carl Landry (I hope), Aaron Brooks and Chuck Hayes.

Which means we could have a 4th Q "finishing 5" of T-Mac, Crazy Pills, Battier, Scola and Yao. Would any team legitimately be able to expect to score more than 20 points in a quarter against that group? Even if the Rockets have trouble scoring on their own (which they won't), they are going to pose defensive matchup nightmares for every team they face. Close games are going to favor the Rockets. Finally.

Though, in the spirit of equal time, here's the rag-tag group the Jazz might throw out on the court next season in their continued effort to offend, insult and bore NBA fans nationwide:

PG: Deron Williams (okay, he's cool)
SG: Ronnie Brewer
SF: Andrei Kirilenko
PF: the guy who stabs blind guys in the front
C: Mehmet Okur

off the bench, the Jazz will have no choice but to turn to:

Ashton Korver, Matt Harpring (pwn3d, bitch!), C.J. Miles and Paul Millsap (unless they also want me to mention Jarron Collins and Brevin Knight, but I'm guessing "no" there).

Hmmm, let's see... starting lineup - definitely favors the Rockets. Major advantages at C and SG overcome Utah's only real advantage - which would be at the PG spot. But since Deron can't play the whole game, the Rockets' depth, size and experience would (and will) overwhelm Utah over the course of any game/series. And don't start with any "Boozer would kill Scola" arguments. Scola is a badass. Boozer is a coward. Scola already has a gold freakin' medal, while Boozer is playing the Christian Laettner role this year for the U.S. squad.

I am so ready for the 2008/2009 season to begin. Rockets v. Jazz, first matchup - Saturday, December 27, 2008 @ Houston. I'll take that belated Christmas gift, thank you very much. Ron Ron will have had 2 months to get acclimated to his new teammates. Correspondingly, the Rockets will have learned how to play as a team by then... uh oh!!!

Things that make me like the Artest trade *more*

I wake up this morning... only to be re-affirmed in my belief that the Artest to the Rockets trade is nothing short of brilliant, and likely to work out quite well.

How is that you ask? Simple.

A certain no-talent-ass-clown does NOT like the trade.

Which almost guarantees that the trade will turn out great for us!

A short recap... the person in question liked the following recent Houston-based team trades/acquisitions:

a. Ed Wade
b. Miguel Tejada
c. Jason Jennings
d. Ahman Green
e. and he probably liked the Philip Buchanon trade, too

and let us also not forget that Mr. Justice still laments the Mario Williams draft pick. His heart is not complete without a little VY in his life...

Apparently the Rockets aren't allowed to draft anyone but nice guys. Someone failed to tell Justice that very, very, very few "winning" teams in the NBA, MLB or NFL comprise a majority of "nice guys".

Michael Jordan - not a nice guy. Not at all.
Muhammad Ali - awesome dude. Just not very nice all the time.
most any HOF-caliber football player - not nice. Not at all.
(This is why David Carr sucks - he's too nice)

Is Ron Artest a "nice guy"? Hell no. I think even he'd admit that himself.
But... Tracy McGrady *is* kind of a nice guy.
And he's 0-7 in the first round of the playoffs.
Yao is a nice guy, too... and that's been the criticism of him for years.

Soooooo... which is it?

I like having likeable dudes on my favorite teams.

... but I like winning more.

Welcome, Crazy Pills!

Ron Artest... a Houston Rocket?

If the rumors are correct, that means we get a 20+ ppg player who is also a former DPOY to match up with Yao, Shane, Scola and Battier. All this because we sneakily drafted/acquired a rookie who put up 40 in a summer league game. I don't think one single meaningless game has ever had such a profound potential impact on the future of our franchise.

This. Is. Awesome.

The only problem is that Ron and Shane basically play the same position. And that position is not point guard. Which means we still have guys named "Rafer" and "Luther Head" on our roster. And not Bobby Jackson. Which means we don't have a point guard. Hmmmmm... awww, the hell with it. Daryl Morey once again showed tonight why he's a genius!! He'll figure something out.

Damn, I am for the first time this offseason really (really) excited for basketball season again! I can't wait to face Utah again now. Just try those bully tactics with Crazy Pills to deal with. It won't work like it did against Tracy. The other added bonus is when T-Mac starts to whine and moan, we are going to have a locker room enforcer to tell him to man up and quit being an Initech employee.

Again - This. Is. Awesome.

We now welcome to the family a Tru Warier.